i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
