you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize