I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize