jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize