yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
