rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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