sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
