Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
