I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Is Oprah even human
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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