I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
