i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize