Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize