My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
