How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
