It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize