Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
