Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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