Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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