Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
