so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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