I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
