well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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