I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
