make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
