I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize