hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
