im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
