My pussy is not your playground.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
