So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
