My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Randomize
