STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
