You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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