Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize