I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
