I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
