sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
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After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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