Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
