After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
