I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
