don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
