new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
