peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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