Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
