I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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