i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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