holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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