it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
