We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
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