What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Someone came in the potted fern
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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