he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
