North Korea, Best Korea!
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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