but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
